I am moving.

For real!

simplicityx.wordpress.com

Reasons:

1) Xanga is slow. Sometimes I can't even load my own page.

2) Sometimes I want to post protected posts which only a few selected people can see, but Xanga does not provide password-protected posts. It enables Xanga lock, which locks out everyone outside Xanga and this Ze Yen doesn't have Xanga therefore it is partly her fault. ;) and Keegan too.

3) The layout is messy.

4) Wordpress more high class =P

5) I don't like my username. I can't believe I chose that when I was 14. mrs_bloom11? Omigod like I am Orlando Bloom's 11th wife or something.

Therefore, goodbye Xanga *sniff sniff* you have been a good friend for 4 years, I'll miss you! T_T

April Fools.

I don't know whether to hate or to love April Fools.

I guess it depends if I am the one playing the prank, or I am the victim.

In 2004, I had a fake ice cream cone which was made of sponge and there was a button I could press and the ice cream would fly and hit people. I offered Wei Chiang the ice cream cone and whacked him full in the face with it and he didn't even know what hit him.

In 2005, it was Sports Day, my mum came to pick me and my sis up from the stadium and she told us that our maid had run away and left the house. I was like, yeah very funny mum you're the biggest joker in the world, but when we got home, we realized that my mum was totally not kidding. O_O

In 2006, I threw a small empty candy box at Ze Yen's feet and screamed "GOT CAT!!!!" and she leapt 10 metres off the ground.

In 2007, Keegan called and told me that Boon Hong likes Yin Lin. Which I totally believed wtf and I think I went around spreading rumours some more.

In 2008, I bluffed you all that I am abandoning my Xanga blog for Wordpress! Hahahaha. April fool!

.

.

.

Not.

I am not kidding about switching =)

I think I am more of a victim this year.

Mr Johnson, our Year 13 Dean, taped one whole section off the Peerswick Room and declared it off-limits because apparently there was an accident involving spilled cleaning agent and a ruined underlaying carpet.

I thought Mr Johnson was totally pulling a prank on us Year 13s, but when he saw some Year 13 students ignoring the sign and walking all over the carpet, he looked pissed to the extreme and everything!!! But later on he called all Year 13s to the Peerswick Room and then we found out it was all a joke =_=

Then we went on a protest and demanded "answers". Well actually I think we protested so that we get to skip class, but anyway the attempt failed because we missed only like 10 minutes of class T_T plus some nerdy students had already placed their asses on their respective seats immediately after Mr Johnson had dismissed us from the Peerswick Room, so the teachers had already started teaching and so I missed out on what Ms Napier was teaching =______=

And I got a call from Chee June today!!! Apparently she is studying Chemical Engineering instead of Law? What the??? O_o Is this another sick joke? Because she went from studying A Levels to Law to Chemical Engineering in the span of 3 months? Chee June I will totally skin you if you were kidding ok.

AND KEEGAN LEE GUAN RU!!!!!!!!!

Omigod. I am so going to break up with you. Please read the following excerpt from the email he sent to me:

We were supposed to watch The Orphanage with Lee and another guy which i just met.  But they decided not to watch it because they thought it was scary.  Instead, we went to watch some independent French film, which was like 50% porn.  Learnt many things =).  Totally uncensored!! 
 
After that, went to Lee's house (supposed to be haunted) but it was actually pretty nice.  So far, all the places i've been to are better than my sister's xD.  Anyway, she apologized cause all the entertainment she had was cigarettes and booze.  So there was not much else to do.  I tried smoking and it felt pretty good.  Before i left, i could make smoke rings with the smoke and stuff.  Lee gave me a packet and a lighter to bring home.  She's really nice.  Anyway, there was also a shot glass chess set so we had a go at it.  Luckily i'm pretty good so my opponent (Kelvin) got drunk and not me.  But i still had to sacrifice some pieces so i was a bit tipsy.  The shot glasses were filled with 70% vodka.  After that, we tried playing some strip poker (except for my sis of course).  It was Kelvin's idea, i think he wanted to see me naked.  Oh did i tell you?  Kelvin invited me to stay over at this house.  He has a double bed which he says we can share.  I think he might have the hots for me. O_o

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT THE HELL?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My boyfriend doesn't smoke! Or watch porn! He has never ever uttered the F word!

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WATCHED PORN! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TRIED SMOKING! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DRANK ALCOHOL! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU PLAYED STRIP POKER!!!!!!!!!

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.

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Contract Of Agreement Code 08-001 states that:

11. Both parties are prohibited from consuming alcohol and drugs, smoking, shishaing, going to night clubs or anywhere deemed inappropriate, watching porn, playing tonsil hockey with strangers, and doing anything deemed immoral while being apart from each other. Permission MUST be obtained from the other party should either one wish to involve himself/herself in these activities, although it will most probably not be given anyhow except for consummation of alcohol.

15. Both parties are not allowed to make friends with and must avoid people who are not morally sensible or carry condoms around.

36. Keegan Lee Guan Ru is not allowed to buy presents for any female friends without consent from Lee Jia Min. He is also forbidden to have any female friends.

This contract of agreement applies from 6th January 2008 till whenever Lee Jia Min sees fit. Breaching of any terms or conditions above will immediately give Lee Jia Min or Keegan Lee Guan Ru to file for a separation.

YOU SIGNED THE CONTRACT!!!!! Oooh, I am so angry. I think this photo is apt as to what I am feeling right now.

And if this was a joke, I am going to castrate you.

I have just added a new condition:

41. Keegan Lee Guan Ru is not allowed to play pranks on Lee Jia Min on April Fool. However, Lee Jia Min is allowed to play pranks on Keegan Lee Guan Ru.

More conditions will be coming up shortly. Our contract is going to stretch to 100 pages long instead of 9! Hah!

And next time you can tell our grandchildren about The Great April Fool Prank Which Backfired.

Yin Lin Oh Yin Lin.

Haha sorry for not updating - I've been busy setting up my new blog. Yes I am really switching to Wordpress. Unless you have any objections! =)

Jonathan wanted to treat me iced coffee today after school but then I had my learner's theory test haha. I got 2 wrong so now I have a learner's license in New Zealand. Woo hoo. Congratulations, me! When I am really really really really good at driving (which is probably 30 years from now T_T), I will sit for my practical.

Anyway, Yin Lin and Amanda went for the hospital attachment programme thing in Malaysia for students wanting to get the JPA scholarship in studying medicine, where they witnessed an AUTOPSY. It was on a fat guy who had like inches of adipose layer, who died of a heart attack.

They saw everything.

EVERYTHING.

The heart, the liver, the lungs, the stomach, even the penis omg... everything! Yin Lin said there was a lot of blood and the whole room smelled like shit. Well no actually she said it smelled like pig intestines. Hmm not too bad I guess hahahaha.

And I can't believe Yin Lin didn't scream at all!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unbelievable, right?! I was nearly fell off my chair when she told me on MSN that she didn't let out one scream. Like what the heck?

The one whose shirt says FORTUNE COOKIE is Oh Yin Lin. (and yes the idiot with the hat and the fan is me - I had just straightenend my hair and I looked very ugly that day so must disguise myself so you'd better shaddap)

Let me tell you something, folks.

1) I have known Yin Lin for 12 years.

2) When our beloved History teacher Mr Rama was telling a ghost story in class and suddenly went "BOOM!" to scare us, she screamed.

3) When we were watching The Exorcist in the school theaterette (haha omg Mag and I still laugh till we cry about this) and two dogs were coincidentally barking in the background and it wasn't even supposed to be scary, she screamed.

4) When we watched horror movies, she had her eyes covered like 95% of the time and even when she didn't know what was going on, even when she couldn't SEE what was going on, she screamed.

5) When a wounded bird appeared in the school corridors when we were doing the Interact Club noticeboard, she screamed.

6) When she saw an ant crawling on her desk last year, she screamed.

...

.......

...........

And yet she was trying to convince me that she did not scream AT ALL when she saw a real human body being sliced open to reveal all the blood and organs and things that she was afraid to look at in horror movies.

Like... what? Yeah right, don't try to pull my leg man, even a slow, tiny and harmless ant scared the shit out of you!!! So I confirmed with Amanda later on when I saw her online. And I was stunned to find out that Yin Lin did NOT scream. At all. In fact, Yin Lin raced to the front to get a good look at the corpse. And she even asked a lot of questions.

Oh. My. God.

I have two theories.

1) My best friend Oh Yin Lin whom I have known for 12 years has been pretending to be scared of everything all this while.

2) My best friend Oh Yin Lin whom I have known for 12 years has been possessed by a very brave and ambitious ghost.

I think Theory No. 1 is null and void, because she does not get any benefits from pretending to be a chicken. Therefore it leaves Theory No. 2.

What's more - she's been to National Service for a week before she came back for the 5-day hospital attachment programme. And you know how loads of people get possessed in NS camps? I reckon one of the really brave and ambitious ghosts has inhabited Yin Lin's vessel. Plus the other day I was webcamming with her and she wouldn't even show her face because she said: "I look like a ghost today." 

Holy macaroni, somebody save her please!!! 

If you are a bomoh who is looking for work online, please contact me. This is my handphone number in NZ: 021- ... in your dreams haha.

Omg Yin Lin... why are you molesting the poor girl's boobs?!

This Yin Lin bluff me one... she said there were cute guys wtf none of them are good-looking. 

Gosh I am so jealous, I wish I were back in Malaysia and I wish I was there to hear the sounds of the scissors cutting open the guy's ribs =P but I have to wait till next year till I see a corpse T_T

(Actually I am not that keen on seeing a corpse, because death is misery... but I'm just excited. For what reason, I don't know. I've killed too many cockroaches and I've seen too many horror movies as a kid to be scared of anything icky, but the idea of seeing a real person who was once alive and kicking being cut open does make my stomach feel a bit queasy. Which is why I am so doing Dentistry.)

Sophia told me that her mum's friend's son, who was doing Health Science First Year in the University of Otago (which is what I will be studying next year, if I really do want to go for Dentistry), said that only 2000 students were accepted into the programme.

And only 200 advance to second year.

O_O

Habislah aku...

And that's not all - the students not only get to see a corpse, they also get to bring a part of the corpse back home for research and for a report. Cool or not!!!!!!!! You can take a tongue, a finger, an ear, etc. And you have to keep it refrigerated so it does not rot. Sophia also told me that many students rush and even fight over the body parts.

Why?

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.

.

Because the last person ends up with the head. n_n

Imagine if you keep the head in the fridge and your flatmate opens it to find someone's head staring back at him/her.

Yeah well something like that, minus the fake eyelashes and stuff.

Coolness!

Jonathan Tan.

Hhahahaa I don't know if you'll see this in time, but since I am your "best best friend" and since you stalk my blog... =P 

Okay here's the solution to the question you were asking =______________________=

Wow see I am so nice please treat me an ice-cream tomorrow ;p

Okay now I have to finish up the rest of my Calculus homework, sigh. I promise to update tomorrow! Or Saturday! Or maybe not update at all.

Because I am thinking of giving up Xanga for Wordpress.

Yes. Goodbye Xanga. Or maybe not. Hmm. Still undecided. More later, peeps! Mwah! <3

Edit: Wait, I just remembered - I can't eat ice-creams anymore because I'm obese. T_T life is miserable.

Outdated Post #4

18 Dec 2007

Jogoya, Starhill Gallery.

Oh Christ, I still have like 9324839471891273 outdated posts to go T_T

Jogoya:

1) all-you-can-eat Japanese buffet.
2) time allocated for you to stuff your stomach = 3 hours. But they don't throw you out anyway.
3) really goooooooooooooooooooood food!
4) SUPER DUPER EXPENSIVE.

I've been to Jogoya once because TzuK, Manda, Cj, Yenny, Ken, Eli and Keegan bugged me to and I had sworn that I would never again enter that place because it cost me RM90. God, I'd rather have new shoes than eat all I want at a buffet and then shit everything out.

But anyway, this time my bestie Yin Lin organized it as a reunion for our class 5Science1, and GIRLS ONLY HAD TO PAY HALF-PRICE, and no matter how stingy I am with my money, I just had to go!!!

Camwhoring in Starhill Gallery toilet with wife Ze Yen and husband Maggie.



Why is my waist so wide!! T_T omigod I miss my hair. It's now 3 inches shorter =((((

One of the many stations where you can take any food you want! The place looks so posh right?!

Our table. We had a whole room to ourselves!

I think this is the only one photo I took of the food O_o

I love love love raw salmon!

It is the best thing in the world! Because salmon is expensive and because it was a buffet, I greedily snatched a whole tray of raw salmon and feasted upon the uncooked meat like a desperate beggar with a voracious appetite. I had so much raw salmon on that day that I nearly puked.

And even if you hate all the food and refuse to eat any, just burying your head into the ice-cream corner would sufficiently make the money you paid for worth every cent. Because they had Haagen Dazs and Baskin Robbins. Because 1 scoop usually costs like RM8. Because you can have as many scoops as you want.

I think I had like 5 or 6. =D

Plus I had oysters, king crabs, raw tuna, king prawns... and a million other things.

Which is why I thought the buffet was worth every cent.

People on my left: my besties Ze Yen, Maggie and Yin Lin. <3

On my right: my adopted daughter from SPCA. =P

Across the table on my left.


Across the table on my right.


On my right.

I zoomed all the way across the table into Dharma's face hahaha Ze Yen caught me in the act and was like making disapproving tsk tsk tsk noises. Haha! Couldn't help it! =P

Miss Tan Ze Yen, second wife of Lee Jia Min.

Me with Miss Horny Coconut Girl.

These four form the Hamachi Club or something. O_o do not blame me for the blurness of the photo! It is Keegan's retarded camera!


Me and Yin Lin and her Roxy bag.

 
Us.


Hahhahaa =_=

Food! Glorious food! (photo courtesy of Wei Li) I seriously pity the people who have to wash our dishes omg there were so many!


Group photos started after we finished stuffing ourselves. Oh yeah I tried raw oysters! It was so disgusting, I spat it out immediately.

Ahahahaha! I love this photo - Yin Lin looked as though she was choking on an olive and Mag looked like she had something to do with it.

(Photo courtesy of Wei Li)

Sabrina happened to be passing by and came to say hi =)

Ahahaha, look at Dharma XD (photo courtesy of Wei)

Group photo! (I know it's blur, blame Keegan's camera T_T)


Another group photo after the slowpokes returned from the toilet.


Group hug!


B.E.R.K.! Hahaha why do Ken and Eli look so unhappy to be in a photo with the other two? Why is Amanda standing like that and why is that gay guy holding his armpit =P

Deepaa and Ming, who is now in Sabah for National Service. I miss you guys! =(

My husband Maggie and our adopted daughter from SPCA. Omigod Keegan your camera sucks!

One last group photo before everyone left... walau so blur! Yin Lin looks so pretty here!! =D

In the very very classy toilet. Haha I didn't know Mag was there when I took this.

Anyway, after everyone had their share of good food, we walked to Pavilion.

It was nearing Christmas and gosh the place was so pretty! And BIG. How I wish the malls here in Christchurch were as big T_T I don't remember what we were doing in Pavilion though O_o I think Amanda and Eli and Ken went to watch I Am Legend or something.

Later on, me, Ze Yen, Yin Lin, Maggie, Tzu Ken, Yen Wei and Keegan went to RedBox in Low Yat Plaza! We paid only RM6 because we were students and we even had 2 free drinks! 6 bucks for 3 hours of karaoke session and 2 free drinks per person!

Oh my god Malaysia rocks. In New Zealand, Sweet Lin told me it's like NZ$30 per person for 2 hours or something and that is, hmm, let me do some math - 

RM78.00.

Holy macaroni. RM6 is only NZ$2.31. Omigod. Compare the prices and tell me why I should not fly back to Malaysia right now.

In the karaoke room! Do you see the small boy at the back? Now, he may look small and innocent but you should not sing karaoke with him because he likes to steal people's microphones and blow your eardrums out with his singing XD



I dunno why Yen Wei wanted to be there haha - she wouldn't even TOUCH the microphone unlike Tzu Ken hahahaha.


Maggie and Yin Lin. Mag and I weren't singing because this Yin Lin lah!!! She picked all the Chinese songs on purpose because she knew Mag and I didn't know any hahaha.

Okay okay the end bye bye selamat jalan.

=______=